06-06-2020
Foosbooze tournaments will be making a comeback.
Foosbooze player Juan has announced the opening of his foosbooze field in The Queen City.
Foosbooze.com reached out to the four original tournament competitors for their thoughts on the new field and future tournaments.
“I will obviously be the first to win a tournament on both fields,” a confident Juan stated. Juan’s last participation in an official tournament ended in victory, and he currently holds the third best winning percentage and third highest average points per match.
However, one of the players with better numbers in these two categories — and the only player to win multiple championships (3) — thinks it won’t take long for him to be back on top. “I think Juan would naturally be the first one to win since he will have plenty of practice, but after a warmup game I’m sure I would take the lead,” claimed foosbooze’s winningest player, Fernando. When asked if he feared Juan starting a dynasty due to his proximity to the new field, Fernando replied it was not really a concern. “If we look at past performance data we can see I have a pretty solid lead, and if we are all present for the championship, I’m sure it will be some tight games.”
“GET ON THE TABLE.” – Fernando
Defending champion JC did not shy away from expectations. He is foosbooze’s all-time leader in both goalie goals and total goals scored. “It’s been great being the champion for the past 5 years, but I’m ready to put my title on the line and be the first foosbooze player to win a championship on both fields,” he stated. When reminded the last tournament only included two of the original foosbooze players (JC and Gus), he was quick to respond. “Look. There’s only one player who loves to bring that up, and that is Fernando. Fernando, if you are reading this, let me remind you that last time we both competed in a tournament, I eliminated you. Had you not b****ed out of the last tournament, the same thing would have happened, and it will happen again on the new field.”
Foosbooze.com made multiple attempts to get foosbooze player Gus’ opinion on these matters, but he declined to answer our questions, stating only that he fears an unfair advantage for shorter players on the new field. “Home field advantage. Taller players have a harder time with shorter fields. In general, players such as Juan and JC are closer to the action. The visual relay is quicker for these guys, allowing them to react quicker.” It should be noted that the new field is indeed shorter, but this difference should be negligible, as it’s only a matter of 3/4″ or ~1.9 cm.
“Well, if you look at his stats, it really isn’t worth interviewing him. I don’t think there’s a story there,” said foosbooze player Fernando, after hearing of Gus’ repeated declines to comment. “Maybe you could ask him how it feels to take so many shots in a single game from that time I played him with only my goalie…” Fernando is of course bringing up that often talked about non-tournament game on the Title Town field. A complete annihilation by Fernando over Gus, made famous (or infamous, depending whom you ask) by Fernando playing only with his goalie. Gus had no answer to Fernando’s tactic and suffered dire and embarrassing consequences. When asked what he’d like to say to the other competitors, Fernando stated, “GET ON THE TABLE.”
A Confident and Welcoming Host
Foosbooze player Juan cannot wait for the first official tournament on northern lands. When asked if he felt any added pressure being the only foosbooze player with regular access to a field, he shrugged it off, saying, “Everyone is fully aware of the fact that carbon under pressure turns into diamonds. I am ready for the pressure and I’m looking forward to shining.” When asked what he’d like to say to his fellow foosbooze players, he excitedly asked, “When can we do this thing?!”